Ask Otto

ASK OTTO

 

                Dear Otto,

I, along with the rest of the school have heard that you were arrested for burning a bush on campus. If this is true, I think that it should have an effect on your status as an “advice columnist”. Why should I listen to a pothead arsonist? What qualifies you to solve my problems? Who are you to tell me what to do?

Sincerely,

Frustrated with the System

Dear Asshole,

To begin with, an arrest is not proof of guilt. Had you spent a little less time reading the newspaper and a little more time going to class, you might know that….but reading newspapers is good too. Yes I was arrested, but I am innocent until proven guilty, but you sir have proven yourself to be a cruel, narrow minded man. I did not mean to burn that bush down, and I should not lose my job for it….I mean I didn’t burn the bush down. Yeedin yip yip and shit.

Sincerely,

Otto

About dailydewmontnews

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Posted on March 26, 2014, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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