I hate college, not purely in the sense that I do not like being told ridiculous nonsense that in no way actually benefits my life (though I do truly and utterly hate that). No, I hate the notion of culturally mandated higher education for what my pretentious self assured mind considers to be more enlightened reasons. You might feel differently. Here’s why you’re wrong.
- The Cost-inordinate to what you receive. This summer I paid a literal 1000$ to take an online film class. I never met my teacher, I never spoke to her, emailed her, or even aw her face, nor could I tell you who else was in my class. What we did? Watched movies. I paid a thousand dollars for a PHD to decide my Netflix que. It’s nonsense. -And what do they do with that money? New buildings, better football players, perhaps a statue of a former school President that none of the students currently enrolled at the University were even aware of. Nonsense bullshit that is putting you tens of thousands of dollars in debt. “But Paul, most of those things are bought by grants, and donations, you ignorant slut.” Well first of all my good man, slut is a cancerous word that our society uses to slap women in their faces, and it is one that should not be uttered on my blog. Second, I know that you ignorant ass munch (not to offend the ass munchers out there). But these things are bought because that is the way in which the world of the university has defined itself. Grand buildings, tremendous stadiums, and expensive sports teams with which to fill them. Silliness. I spent three semesters at a community college- same resources as my current university, but a literal fourth of the cost.
- “College prepares you for the real world”. Haha oh does it? That real world where you party five nights out of the week, work sporadic day time hours, and pay some one hefty fees to boss you around? College is nothing like the real world. it’s not even similar. Yes, it provides you a chance to move out of your parents house, but guess what? For 450 a month you can do that anyway.
- “College makes you a smarter, more well informed member of society.” Oh does it? I wish someone had told me that four years ago, I might have found the time to smile about it. That’s horse shit, and you know it. College, as in everything else, can only inform you as much as you decide you want it to. You want to be informed? Read a newspaper, they’re seventy five cents. So what am i proposing? Nothing. This system isn’t going anywhere, and it never will. It’s too ingrained in our society for it to go anywhere. All i can suggest is that we stop pretending that it is some temple of enlightenment, and call it what it is- an institution used to designate the haves and have nots. Those with degrees- now deemed worthy of a decent job, and those without, who can’t hope to. It’s bullshit, but it’s our bullshit, so own up to it.
Thanks for reading.
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