I hate college, not purely in the sense that I do not like being told ridiculous nonsense that in no way actually benefits my life (though I do truly and utterly hate that). No, I hate the notion of culturally mandated higher education for what my pretentious self assured mind considers to be more enlightened reasons. You might feel differently. Here’s why you’re wrong.
- The Cost-inordinate to what you receive. This summer I paid a literal 1000$ to take an online film class. I never met my teacher, I never spoke to her, emailed her, or even aw her face, nor could I tell you who else was in my class. What we did? Watched movies. I paid a thousand dollars for a PHD to decide my Netflix que. It’s nonsense. -And what do they do with that money? New buildings, better football players, perhaps a statue of a former school President that none of the students currently enrolled at the University were even aware of. Nonsense bullshit that is putting you tens of thousands of dollars in debt. “But Paul, most of those things are bought by grants, and donations, you ignorant slut.” Well first of all my good man, slut is a cancerous word that our society uses to slap women in their faces, and it is one that should not be uttered on my blog. Second, I know that you ignorant ass munch (not to offend the ass munchers out there). But these things are bought because that is the way in which the world of the university has defined itself. Grand buildings, tremendous stadiums, and expensive sports teams with which to fill them. Silliness. I spent three semesters at a community college- same resources as my current university, but a literal fourth of the cost.
- “College prepares you for the real world”. Haha oh does it? That real world where you party five nights out of the week, work sporadic day time hours, and pay some one hefty fees to boss you around? College is nothing like the real world. it’s not even similar. Yes, it provides you a chance to move out of your parents house, but guess what? For 450 a month you can do that anyway.
- “College makes you a smarter, more well informed member of society.” Oh does it? I wish someone had told me that four years ago, I might have found the time to smile about it. That’s horse shit, and you know it. College, as in everything else, can only inform you as much as you decide you want it to. You want to be informed? Read a newspaper, they’re seventy five cents. So what am i proposing? Nothing. This system isn’t going anywhere, and it never will. It’s too ingrained in our society for it to go anywhere. All i can suggest is that we stop pretending that it is some temple of enlightenment, and call it what it is- an institution used to designate the haves and have nots. Those with degrees- now deemed worthy of a decent job, and those without, who can’t hope to. It’s bullshit, but it’s our bullshit, so own up to it.
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For those of you that have not been reading along (I’m talking to you, World Wide Web) my name is Paul Durante, and for the past, ohhh twenty or so years I was just a shell of what I could be. In that time, I have met people that I care about, gone places that expanded my horizon’s past the corn filled soils of Illinois, and even written things that i am somewhat proud of, but it took me up until this summer to find what I can finally call, success. And how might a mediocre small scale internet personality quantify success? Well since no one reads or watches my things, this online pest has had to go the deeper, more personal route. Marrying my wife, was the best decision that I have ever made, opening my life up to something that it had previously never been familiar with: daily joy. Even before, when we were only dating, or even engaged, the happiness was still tremendous, spiritual, and perfect beyond what I had ever before known, but now as I pound away at these keys with a wedding band on my left hand, something has changed. There is a new sense of simplistic profundity to this familiar and yet new sense of happiness, and I am afraid that it is a profundity that I cannot explain in this blog, most especially because nobody pays me for this shit.
But amongst this wonderful and exciting new chapter of my life is an ever so feint veil of surprise and speculation from my peers. Oh yes, I am still a student.
“What do you think? Unplanned pregnancy?”
“You don’t thing….surely he isn’t a Christian?”
Okay, okay, so no one is literally circling up and whispering gossip in my face. In fact, the vast majority of friends and family have been very supportive of our decision, but in the background there has always been this since of judgemental speculation.
So lets clear things up.
- Nope, no pregnancy, planned or otherwise, although I do believe I would look glowing with a baby bump.
- Excuse you sirs and maams, but we have been together for three years. There is nothing blind or reckless about it. There isn’t a reckless bone in my body.Your reading the words of a man too cowardly to even attempt to parralell park.
- Haha no. I’m not a Christian, nor am I in any capacity religious. But do try not to say it with such stank in your voice next time.
Here’s the deal. When you know, you just know. Are we young? Perhaps slightly. But we are also financially able to pay for our own food, transportation, and living quarters (which we would have had to do regardless of whether or not we had gotten married) and in roughly nine months, we will also be degree holding members of society (despite my utter disdain for all thinks scholastic).
We are happy, which as far as I am concerned means that we are doing something right, because really, how often is there something to smile about?
Thanks for reading,
If you have any questions or comments, leave them! I love hearing from you guys
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Oh hi there. It’s been a while hasn’t it? Listen….I got married. I like you all and everything,but quite frankly none of you seemed entirely interested in spending the rest of your life with me, so the blog had to take what I suppose you could call a brief hiatus. So now, school starts in several days, and I thought to myself “what better time to initiate a major distraction?” The privilage of an education does have a way of making you want to completely disconnect from the world, and given that in nine months I will be expected to try and join the work force with nothing but an English degree and a bad attitude to guide me, I thought that now would be the perfect time to fully immerse myself in a world that is tedious as it is pointless. Because really,while I do like you guys, but given that there is only like three of you, this blog is about as worthwhile as anything else, which is to say not very. But hey, it’s more fun than school, and still probably worth my time than a real job. So yes, The goal, the hope, the aspiration is to do this as close to daily as I possibly can. You’ll get to here about my marriage, my web series, and my stupid opinions!
Cheers to that eh?
Thanks for reading-
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*Thanks for Reading-If you enjoy please Follow me on Twitter @DewmontPaul, and follow my blog by inputting your email address on the right hand side of the screen*
I feel as though I only ever get on this thing when I am angry with global affairs anymore, but then that makes sense, given that I am always angry with global affairs. Actually I am not sure that it is fair to say global…more like national, and in this case, campus wide. Yes that’s right, my very own university is currently making the headlines that make me want to spontaneously combust with rage. If its all the same to you folks, I’d rather not say where I go-you know for the purpose of personal preservation and all, but rest assured it is a sess pool of frivolous exams, mediocre food, and apparently a fleet of ignorant assholes just barely smart enough to express their hateful little thoughts on social media. For those of you unfamiliar with the plague that is Yik Yak, it is essentially an anonymous version of twitter that allows for users to share their thoughts, coordinate parties by utilizing geographically focused posts, and making racist assholes of themselves for all of my lovely surragote town to see. I come from a town that is not astoundingly diverse, but growing up the attitudes and sentiments that I encountered were generally good spirited, even when they were somewhat culturally unaware, but what I have encountered here speaks loudly of one tragically undeniable truth:if such a thing as a post racial society exists, we are not living in it.
I feel safe in saying that everyone reading this is aware of the videotaped murder of Eric Garner that was carried about by police men on the streets of New York city. And if that is the case I am equally confident that you all know that his murderers have not been indicted. Now I can not speak of the heart of Daniel Panteleo (Garner’s murderer). I cannot say for certain if he is a racist, or simply a violent man but I can say that the Grand Jury’s inability to indict him is very much indicitive of a society that does not value black lives. It is because of this lack of respect for the African American population that students at my school chose to organize a peaceful protest under the simple yet poignant slogan- black lives matter. It’s a phrase that has been all over the news lately, as well it should be, and as I am sure most would see it, it is a phrase that is not in the least bit offensive. Right?
Wrong. That’s the way that my campus seems to feel anyway. Yik Yak lit up in light of the looming protests with messages only the most simplistic and hateful minds could have concocted.
Black lives dont matter.
Lincoln never should have freed you.
If I see a protesting black person today I’m going to shoot them.
This goes far beyond racial insensitivity. Its insanity. It is literally some of the most hateful language that I have ever encountered in my life before, and while it may fit in just fine at a klan meeting, it has no business residing on the social media page of what is supposed to be an educated campus. Truthfully, I can’t comment much more on it- there is very little else for me to say. But I would like to hear what you think. What’s the solution here? What does bull crap like this mean for our county, and what can we do to resolve it?
Thanks for reading folks,
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oh goodness. with six days left at being at this very expensive hell whole, i can hardly contain my excitement. this week has been an epic of papers. to say that i had english classes now is an understatement, but regardless it is a fleeting one. school will end and break will begin and all will be good until..well until school starts again. but thats a different matter altogether. the point i make with this is not that misery is once again looming, but rather that everything is eventual. christ, i can very much remember the mindset that nothing could possibly exist outside of grade school, and while my interests have not changed very much since then, life has gone on just fine, and i entered into the next never ending phase of life: high school. again, needless to say but high school came and went and now im in college. what im learning is that life is very rarely going to be ideal, but what is coming next is not something that i want to coast through. i have grown so accostumed to wishing away time that to some degree it is all that i really know how to do. but as i said, what comes next can happen for as long as it wishes. as many people who read this blog know, i am getting married this summer. what comes next is life, and the last thing that i want is to realize that i wished it all away.
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to be fair the same could be said of most any era. what? do you really not know what im reffering to? read the fucking title and get back to me. anyway yes. brainwashed. there seems to be this regrettable notion amongst people of my age that we are in some way more enlightened than say the people from our parents generation. today i saw someone tweet “youre just jealous because we’re young and evolved.” listen motherfucker, i can recognize that that tweet was in no way directed towards me, but lets take a step back and reevaluate a few things first shall we? first of all, you cant even contemplate referring to yourself as “evolved,” if you were planning on doing so in the same twenty four hour span of time that you have taken a selfie. it simply isnt possible. that right away eliminates sixty percent of the so called evolved folk that might have taken delight in reading this oh so refined tweet. secondly, we come from an era with six dollar coffee, snapchat, and pants that are essentially black nylon body paint. we arent exactly starting a revolution, and while miley cyrus music may be catchy the fact that she stands amongst our pop icons of the era isnt doing us any favors either. i will not go as far as to say that we are fucked, as such a thing is far too bleak than i care to delve into, and anyway, i do believe it is a tad over stated to begin with. there are brilliant minds walking among us, and yes some of them are bumping a wrecking ball on their iphones they just selfied on, wearing yoga pants, and toting a seven dollar cup of coffee. i’m not writing to condemn my era- god knows theyre the only ones that watch my videos anyway. im writing to humble them. the truth is the vast majority of the world that we know is about one decade away from being substantially older than they would care to be, and while age should not be a point of shame, it some how has become exactly that. most likely because of the noisy young “evolved,” twitter tweeter that doesnt realize that in a few years they are going to be creating children that will end up making the exact same statement to them. what i think often gets lost in the commotion of every day life is that we very much life in a multigenerational society. in a world were people are working into their later years, a much larger segment of the population is not playing a role in the general mechanics of our society. we are living in a massive melting pot after all. unless youre a pokemon, there is no such thing as young and evolved. rather we are all products of multigenerational society that might want to consider getting along. it will be a hell of a long ride if we dont.
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im not one for making fun of other peoples shit, mostly because it invites the same sort of treatment into my life, but my goodness, did you see last weekends snl? i know that in making comments now, nearly five days after the fact i am showing up late to a party that really wasnt much of anything to begin with, but what do you want from me? im a college student with four papers to do and a resolution to write on his blog every day. not every topic is going to change the world or be you know…good.
speaking of which, snl this weekend was NOT good. granted, i did not watch the episode in its entirety but what i did saw, made me wish that i hadnt watched any of it at all. first we had nicki minaj playing beyonce. now to be fair, i watched with my fiance, and she found that hilarious. i on the other hand was not so amused, mostly because i thought that the two were the same person. beyonce and nicki minaj i mean, i generally have a pretty firm grasp of who my fiance is and is not. dont mistake this for a fucking race thing. its not. i dont think that the two of them look similar at all. this is a talent thing. both women are good singers that somehow manage to continually put out shitty music. you can call it the miley cyrus effect, or you can call it contemporary pop, but just dont make me listen to it. aside from that we had mr james franco. in this life the man is best at being a fucking weirdo, and in this performance we didnt even get that from him. the only thing worse than his christopher waken impersonation was his james franco impersonation. all in all the entire episode was a dissapointment, and this is coming from someone who watched it while they were supposed to be doing a paper.
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the title is an understatement. i have four research papers due friday, and four tests in between now and and next tuesday. my life is a blur between what is important (pokemon and my loving fiance) to what is not important (school) and in fits of exhaustion this blur has become something far more sinister A BLEND. “the implications of victor frankensteins quest to conquer death carry over well to a modern context because ash ketchem is eternally ten years old, and rachels favorite color is purple.” im not even writing any more. my brain is throwing up ideas onto the page in the hope that some of it might might come up as undigested corn, or in other words, salvageable. im not looking for that brown muckusy crap kids, i want the gold, but it just isnt happening for me. im burnt out every which way that can be..well burned and that says a lot for a kid that never really gave a shit to begin with. ive always maintained that i am a high school dropout in the body of a junior in college. proceduraly speaking, there arent many corrective options for a person such as myself, although i suppose that technically for a more adventerous sort of folk my situation could easily be rectifying just by you know..not going to class or paying my bills anymore. while the prospect is tempting the fallout is not. as a man (and yes i said man intentionally, though the word came through my fingers and onto my keyboard with a twinge of hesitancy) with a tremendous amount of new and upcoming responsibilities, dropping out is no longer the option that it once was. ive put in far too much time and money into this cluster fuck of tediousness and monotony to let it all go to waste now, and while the experience has not been entirely lost on me, it has for the most part proven time and time again not to be my cup of tea. while internally im fully prepared to switch over to coffee, the results would be disastrous. my fiance is an eduaction major like myself. while i believe that the educational system as a whole is entirely fucked, and that i might be able to in some way make a difference in that regard, i still do not want to go down that path. i am a writer. its the only thing that i am good at, and i am sure that there are plenty of you out there reading this right now that would maintain that i am not even particularly great at this either. regardless, the two of us might struggle on teachers salaries. a low traffic blogger certainly isnt going to be bringing home the rent checks. so for now, yes, i am stuck throwing up ideas onto microsoft word in the hopes that they are passable and properly cited in mla format.
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After just having read about the latest instance of grand jury negligence in the face of police brutality I have found myself angry both in the lack of justice our country has encountered over the past few weeks, and by public response. Listen, not everything can be made about race. I am not by any means saying that Michael Brown and Eric Gardners deaths are not a direct result of their skin color, but I am saying that if a defense attorney can so much as suggest that their client is not a racist the entire case is over. Excuse the pun, but racism is not black and white. There some people among us who are simply violent imbeciles regardless of whether or not the mound of flesh they intend to mutilate is white or black. Because I do believe that that is how they see things. Michael Brown should not be dead today, but he should have been arrested on the day of that shooting. You can call me insensitive all you want if that is your prerogative but I truthfully do not give two fucks. He broke the law and he deserved consequences in the same way that Darren Wilson did. While Mr. Garner’s alleged crime was of a shockingly more tame nature than that of Michael Brown’s according to state and federal law he too was in a position to be processed. In neither case did officers invent charges to throw at their victims. These were crimes that were called in by other people. They were doing their jobs by attempting to arrest them. This is not the point of contention. Violence is. When the lines are blurred the side of the argument that is blurring the loses all credibility, and these lines have been blurred. It is very difficult to prove on a legal scale that Darren Wilson or Daniel Pantaleo (the man that murdered Eric Garner) are racist. However, it is far easier to prove that they are assholes. That is to say, it is much easier to make a case that they unjustly or unrightly took the life of another HUMAN BEING. Those are the words that we should be focused on leading up to an indictment. HUMAN LIFE. That is what Eric Garner and Michael Brown were. People. Racial demonstrations are important. Despite my white privilege I am entirely aware that there is a tremendous portion of the population that is hurting deeply. They need a voice, but it cannot be one of sensationalization. Because that is what the media will talk about. That’s what they thrive on. Historically speaking, Michael Brown will most likely be the smallest aspect of the story when people look back. They will mostly only ever remember the fact the fact that Ferguson burned the night that the Grand Jury neglected to indict Darren Wilson. Stop the violence and racial equality will ensue.
Thats all I have on the matter for right now, but listen closely. Read these words really fucking carefully because I don’t want to have to repeat them in the comment section because some confrontation seeking reader chose to use my own words against me: I am not saying that these cases are not about race. I am telling you that if these men are going to go to jail it is going to be for murder, not for racism.
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i have forteen more days of school but zero fucks to give. im no good at math, and in fact that is one of the reasons for my zero fuck giving, but regardless i am quite certain that i might be metaphorically fucked by my projected output of work for the coming days. those of you familiar with university life understand that this is not good. in fact if ever there was a pair of weeks for me to work hard throughout, it would be these two. finals are looming, and while i am certainly getting reacquainted with their pressures and demands, my fucks to give ratio is nonetheless….fucked. heres the thing; none of this shit matters. i was tired of it early august, before any of it even started because like i said…it doesnt matter. science might end up curing cancer, but i certainly wont. math might be handy if dont have a calculator near by, and grammar was replaced by spell check..well whenever spell check came out. thats it. thats my post to day kids; an angry little exscursion away from the dreadful paper im writing.
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